The awesome of introverts (and extroverts too)

I’ve been having a funny experience of my own introversion this week.  Right now I’m happy as a clam to curl up in my shell and just be- in solitude, able to dip down into my well and refill my cup, to be refreshed and to live largely below the surface.  I’m also noticing the voice of my social self- that part of me that’s out to please others with little regard for how I’m really feeling- and how it keeps telling me that there’s something wrong with wanting to feel refreshed and fulfilled, that it’s weird that being alone is fulfilling for me, that others will be displeased with me if I choose to pass on social events or small talk, and that I have no business wanting solitude because I’ve chosen to be the parent of three children.  My social self can be quite judgmental.

I began to ask myself what is awesome about being an introvert?  How do introverts give back to the world in ways that perhaps extroverts do not? (though of course extroverts have their own gifts… I just don’t know what that’s like, being an introvert and all…)  In my moodling on this I made the mistake of doing a Google search.  What I found was that even on sites that intended to extoll the virtues of introversion, I was bombarded with negative assumptions I hadn’t even considered.   Talk about sending that social self voice on a field day?  I hadn’t even realized all the horrors we introverts are inflicting upon ourselves and the world- OMG, WE MUST CHANGE NOW!  Just kidding.  I closed my browser toute de suite.  This was not what I had in mind at all. Luckily I found my answer after a few minutes of quiet contemplation (just like an introvert, ya know?).

For introverts, recognizing that we’re energized by solitude and deep relationships gives us the chance to provide ourselves with this gift.  When we work within this nature, knowing how to fill our sails and fuel our passions, we are best able to step out into the world and share our gifts.  We can also share our passions in an introverted way, by working alone then sending our creations out into the world or by sharing them with just one person at a time.  When we don’t give ourselves full permission to replenish our fuel, when we don’t accept this in ourselves and relax into it, when we continually nag ourselves to be different,  we’re more likely to feel the world is a hostile place and retreat further-  not replenishing our energy,
not accessing our passions and not able to share them with the world.

And then it hit me.  I bet extroverts experience the same thing in an opposite package!  I’m guessing that when an extrovert doesn’t interact and surround themselves with different people and ideas and energies, they are less able to reach inward and access their own passions and muses. (extroverts- can you confirm this?)   So the most wonderful thing about being an introvert- or an extrovert- is simply in knowing who you are, what fills you up, how to access your highest self and share it with the world.  It looks different for introverts and extroverts, but ultimately it’s what allows each of us to thrive.  And how freakin’ cool is that?

Until next time- wishing you the space to be exactly who you are,

Lesley

Advertisements

2 Comments to “The awesome of introverts (and extroverts too)”

  1. Hi, Lesley….I found this blog through your program bio for We Shine….I’m glad to be reading about this topic!!!! I, too, have been thinking about it a lot in recent days….Like you, I so enjoy being an introvert and am glad that I am at a stage of life where I have discovered this and so many ways to enjoy it….I am also amazed at how challenged I can be when I’m with extroverts and start to forget who and how I am!

    Thanks for sharing your truth. Hearing it has helped me support myself more fully.

    Maybe see you at Shine!

    Nancy

    • Hi Nancy,
      I’m sorry we didn’t get to connect at Shine! I’m so glad my post spoke to you- it’s so important to me that we value ourselves and our needs within the framework of our connected family lives. Thanks so much for leaving your comment!

      Lesley

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: